Quote of the Day (2011-10-31)

Mark Loring: Why does everyone think yellow is gender neutral? I never knew a guy with a yellow room.

Source: Juno

Quote of the Day (2011-10-29)

Well, that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2011-10-28)

Ian Faith: The Boston gig has been cancelled...

David St. Hubbins: What?

Ian Faith: Yeah. I wouldn't worry about it though, it's not a big college town.

Source: This is Spinal Tap

Quote of the Day (2011-10-27)

Miracle Max: You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2011-10-26)

Woodchuck Todd: [in Woodchuck costume carrying head] Hey Olive.

Olive Penderghast: Oh my God! The illusion is shattered! This is exactly why they put you in the gas chamber if you take your head off at Disney World.

Woodchuck Todd: Actually I think they just, you know, they fire you. You're thinking of Disneyland. Disney World is much more liberal.

Olive Penderghast: Oh yeah! I always forget Disney World went blue in the last election.

Source: Easy A

Quote of the Day (2011-10-25)

Michael Bolton: You haven't even been showing up for work, and you got to keep your job.

Peter Gibbons: Actually I'm being promoted.

Source: Office Space

Quote of the Day (2011-10-24)

Sir Humphrey: "Politicians like to panic, they need activity. It's their substitute for achievement."

Source: Yes, Minister

Quote of the Day (2011-10-23)

"I usually last about ten minutes on the stairmaster. Unless, of course, there's someone stretching in front of me in a leotard, then I can go an hour. That's why they call it the stairmaster. You get up there and you stare."

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2011-10-22)

Judith: [on Stan's desire to be a mother] Here! I've got an idea: Suppose you agree that he can't actually have babies, not having a womb - which is nobody's fault, not even the Romans' - but that he can have the *right* to have babies.

Francis: Good idea, Judith. We shall fight the oppressors for your right to have babies, brother... sister, sorry.

Reg: What's the *point*?

Francis: What?

Reg: What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies, when he can't have babies?

Francis: It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression.

Reg: It's symbolic of his struggle against reality.

Source: Life of Brian

Quote of the Day (2011-10-21)

Basil Fawlty: [about Sybil's laugh] Sounds like somebody machine-gunning a seal.

Source: Fawlty Towers

Quote of the Day (2011-10-20)

Toula Portokalos: When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns.

Source: My Big Fat Greek Wedding

Quote of the Day (2011-10-19)

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.

Source: Monty Python's Flying Circus

Quote of the Day (2011-10-18)

Homer: Homer no function beer well without.

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2011-10-17)

Rebecca: You know, I really think I can put together a great Thanksgiving dinner. This'll be the second one that I've cooked, and believe me, the first one was not the disaster that my family said it was. Those kids had a pretty good time in that ambulance.

Source: Cheers

Quote of the Day (2011-10-16)

Becky: Verbal ability is a highly overrated thing in a guy, and it's our pathetic need for it that gets us into so much trouble.

Source: Sleepless in Seattle

Quote of the Day (2011-10-15)

Dot: I'm sure you have the life insurance squared away?

Ed McDonnough: Have we done that honey? We gotta do that honey!

Dot: You gotta do that HI! Ed's got her hands full with this little angel.

H.I.: Yes, ma'am.

Dot: What would Ed and little angel do if a truck came along and splattered your brains all over the interstate?

Ed McDonnough: Yeah honey! What if you get run over?

Dot: Or carried off by a twister?

Source: Raising Arizona

Quote of the Day (2011-10-14)

Sir Humphrey: "Bernard, what is the purpose of our defence policy?"

Bernard Woolley: "To defend Britain."

Sir Humphrey: "No, Bernard. It is to make people believe Britain is defended."

Bernard Woolley: "The Russians?"

Sir Humphrey: "Not the Russians, the British! The Russians know it is not."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2011-10-13)

Niles: I'm not without resources. My Tae-Kwan-Do instructor tells me I'm two moves away from being quite threatening.

Source: Frasier

Quote of the Day (2011-10-12)

[Bart has had his ear pierced]

Lisa: An earring, how rebellious. In a conformist sort of way.

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2011-10-11)

"We're friends. If I'm going to be uncomfortable, you gotta be uncomfortable too!"

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2011-10-10)

Are you suggesting coconuts are migratory?

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2011-10-09)

Sally: And it's not the same for men. Charlie Chaplin had kids when he was 73.

Harry: Yeah, but he was too old to pick them up.

Source: When Harry Met Sally

Quote of the Day (2011-10-08)

Listen -- strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2011-10-07)

Jim Hacker: "Bernard, this government is here to govern, not merely preside like our predecessors did. When a country is going downhill, it is time for someone to get into the driving seat, and put his foot on the accelerator."

Bernard Woolley: "I think you mean the brake."

Source: Yes, Minister

Quote of the Day (2011-10-06)

Sam Baldwin: Well I'm not looking for a mail-order bride! I just want somebody I can have a decent conversation with over dinner. Without it falling down into weepy tears over some movie!

Greg: She's, as you just saw, very emotional.

Sam Baldwin: Although I cried at the end of "the Dirty Dozen."

Greg: Who didn't?

Sam Baldwin: Jim Brown was throwing these hand grenades down these airshafts. And Richard Jaeckel and Lee Marvin

[Begins to cry]

Sam Baldwin: were sitting on top of this armored personnel carrier, dressed up like Nazis...

Greg: [Crying too] Stop, stop!

Sam Baldwin: And Trini Lopez...

Greg: Yes, Trini Lopez!

Sam Baldwin: He busted his neck while they were parachuting down behind the Nazi lines...

Greg: Stop.

Sam Baldwin: And Richard Jaeckel - at the beginning he had on this shiny helmet...

Greg: [Crying harder] Please no more. Oh God! I loved that movie.

Source: Sleepless in Seattle

Quote of the Day (2011-10-05)

Jim Hacker: "Honesty always gives you the advantage of surprise in the House of Commons."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2011-10-04)

"It's smart. It's a smart line, and a smart crowd will appreciate it. And I'm not going to dumb it down for some bonehead mass audience!"

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2011-10-03)

Derek Smalls: We're very lucky in the band in that we have two visionaries, David and Nigel, they're like poets, like Shelley and Byron. They're two distinct types of visionaries, it's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water.

Source: This is Spinal Tap

Quote of the Day (2011-10-02)

Peter Gibbons: Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about about mission statements.

Source: Office Space

Quote of the Day (2011-10-01)

Miracle Max: He probably owes you money huh? I'll ask him.

Inigo Montoya: He's dead. He can't talk.

Miracle Max: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

Inigo Montoya: What's that?

Miracle Max: Go through his clothes and look for loose change.

Source: The Princess Bride